One morning, when I was waiting for a friend outside my apartment building, a runner approached me. He wanted to know if I lived in the building, what type of apartment I lived in, and how much I paid for rent. I let him know that I did and gave him an estimate for the type of apartment he was looking for but he wanted to know specifically how much I paid for rent. I wasn’t comfortable sharing any more information and quickly ended the conversation.

He got the hint but then said, “Okay, give me hug” and began to come closer.

He was running when we met and his white t-shirt was soaked with sweat. I was dressed for work so it was a “no, thank you” on the hug. Honestly, it would’ve been a “no” no matter what he was wearing. When I said no, he said I was “mean.”

Puh-lease, I’ve been called worse.

I made it clear he should be on his way.

I’ve learned when someone says you’re “mean,” “rude,” or “bitchy,” “what they really mean is “I can’t control you.”

But it’s okay to set firm boundaries. And it’s okay to enforce boundaries when you feel others aren’t respecting yours.

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